Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Hello, Hello, and Goodbye...for now

Paul is asleep in the bedroom, as he has to get up at 5 tomorrow to get ready for work. Next to him is Nicky, and nestled in between them is Holly, my little rescue pup that I got myself for Christmas.

He and Nick are very irritated with what they call the "little crack puppy," who truly is a hyper little handful, but she restores my soul. Not to call her God, of course, but she's certainly one of God's means of restoring my often worn-out, distraught soul. 

Another is my beautiful granddaughter, Claire, who came into this world just 3 days after Christmas. I'm lucky enough to have a little playpen in my office, and a big recliner (I hate it, but it does the job) to hold her and read to her when her mommy needs a little break or even just a shower!

 
It's a big deal, learning how to be a grandmother. I have to be very careful not to horn in on the mothering process...not that it's needed! My stepdaughter is the finest mother I've ever seen, sharing herself unlimitedly with her daughter. It's just a funny line...I wonder if I should ask, not ask, beg...be eager, not eager, etc., when it comes to being an extra set of arms. I try to simply be available and willing. Having Brian and Jessica here with us as they start their little family has been such a blessing, another one of God's wonderful gifts, giving me yet another opportunity to get to know Jessica and to share love with her. That there's this soft cuddly baby and extra-enjoyable son-in-law is like icing. Sometimes when I am feeling down on myself I remember how much God must love me, to keep giving me opportunity after opportunity to get things right, to experience them the way He intends.

Now, we've had the 2 hellos. Let me explain the goodbye. My husband's mother, Barbara (the first Claire was her mother) passed away the day after Christmas, just 2 days before our little Claire was born. I won't comment on her much, because hers isn't my story to tell. But I've always felt compassion for her, and when she died I was, in fact, overjoyed that she was being reunited with a son who died at just a few months old. It was very reminiscent of my grandmother and Maia, and perhaps it's why I have dreamt of Grandmother nearly every night for the past couple of months. I met Barbara at the funeral of her husband, Paul's father, John. I remember praying then and asking Grandmother to welcome him into heaven and to show him around, to introduce him to our family so he would know something about what his son was marrying into. Grandmother being the ultimate hostess, I felt she'd be really good at it. Funny, I didn't ask her to do the same with Barbara, who strikes me as being perfectly capable of showing herself around the Great Beyond without a guide. Perhaps they'll be friends anyway.

Well that's enough for now. Not that there's not LOTS to catch up on. But I've found myself less and less posting news...here, on Facebook, on Twitter, or email...as my life fills up with real stuff to do. Rocking a baby to sleep or playing fetch with a puppy who needs to be tired out before she'll sleep the night through. But I'm going to give it the old college try, posting a bit a few times a week. Yes...I know, I've said that before.

Nighty night!
Tam


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